Blanket
by Regina Rizzoli-Isles
Summary: Maura breathes steadily. Face down and hands firmly planted on the kitchen counter. "Why," The blonde looks up at the soft voice . She is facing a mirror of herself long ago. A thirteen year old with wide green eyes that hold confusion. Hurt. "Why didn't you tell us sooner?" Maura closes her eyes and she breathes. It's so hard to breathe. "Denial is the worst kind of lie, Alice."
1. Chapter 1

**_Author's Note:_**

 ** _Before you continue I want to warn that there is a major character death._**

 ** _But it's not what you think._**

 ** _If you wish to continue go ahead. If not, that is perfectly okay._**

 ** _Enjoy:)_**

* * *

 _Running water. It sounds like a stream of water floating down the river in my ears. I see the sun at the end of the bank; serene and sweet. So sweet that I could taste it ._

 _Whatever it was melted in my mouth. I looked down. My feet were bare.  
Tilting my head to the side in question I took a step further and noticed beneath my feet was grass. I looked up. An endless field of green grass and the river beside me.  
The sun at the end of the bank. It seemed so close.  
I could feel it. The warmth emancipated gradually toward my way, the sunlight became brighter.  
I stepped closer. __Something rustled behind me. More rustling. My head turns around to see woods, a shadow hiding behind a tree._

 _"Hello?"_ _My voice sounds gone. Far away. Very far away._ _I step to the figure that stays hidden behind the tree._

 _I'm closer._  
 _"Hello?"_ _I circle the tree to see porcelain feet._  
 _"Hel-"_  
 _Nothing. The shadow is gone._  
 _"Jane."_  
 _My eyes widen. Not at my name being called but the voice to whom it belongs to._  
 _My head jerks around to see. Where is she?_  
 _The water is louder and my feet are cold. I look down. The water has run over onto the grass. Into the grass. Onto the land._  
 _"Jane."_  
 _My head jerks to my right._  
 _I can't believe what I see._  
 _There she is. Green eyes smiling as one is painted across her lips. The infectious smile with the head tilt and exposed dimples._  
 _Her hair is glowing and perhaps it's from the aura that surrounds her as she stands feet away from the wife she left._  
 _"Maura."_  
 _She holds out her hand._  
 _The water. I look down. The water is covering my ankles. I look up._  
 _The glow is gone, the smile is gone._  
 _"Let's go. You are not meant to be here."_  
 _I frown. "Maura? What are you-"_  
 _My hand is grabbed by hers. I'm being pulled slowly and then we are running._  
 _"Maura?!"_  
 _"It's okay."_  
 _I can't see her face. I only see the back of her as we are running._  
 _Running where?_  
 _"It's time for you to go back."_  
 _Back. Back?_  
 _No!_  
 _Her hand let's go._  
 _"No!"_  
 _She's gone. Again._  
 _"Don't leave me! Maura please! Don't leave me again, PLEASE!"_

.

.

Bright lights. The lights are so damn bright.  
"Ugh…" Jane groans raising her arm over her eyes. Her whole body is sore and stiff. Not a good combination.  
"The hell…" She gruffs angrily sitting up on a...hospital bed.  
What?  
"Mom."Mom? Frowning and sporadically looking to her left Jane froze.

The soft but firm voice chiming 'Mom' -clearly mistaking because Jane was no one's mom- belonged to this teenager who looked just like-  
"I can't believe you're awake Mama."  
She didn't have any kids. Right?  
Jane frowned. Right?  
Wait, awake? Huh?  
"Mom." The girl smiled wide this time from ear to ear. Quite bright and quite familiar.  
"Do you want me to go and get Nonna?"  
Jane's eyebrows rose. She didn't know what to say. She sure didn't think what she was thinking now would be appropriate either.  
Suddenly the girl laughed. A breathless laugh that chimed joy, realization and relief.  
"Of course..," She shook her head and hid her smile with a lightly scarred hand. "I'll go get the nurse."  
Watching the girl stand Jane nearly doubled over.  
The teen had on blue jeans with a long patterned cardigan wrapped around her frame but Jane could tell that she was skinny. Skinny and tall. Her skin was a rosy pale that glowed somehow.  
Jane gulped.  
The teen also had blonde hair that reached down to the middle of her back. Two black clips doing a poor job of keeping side swept bangs out of her face.  
Jane blinked and looked at the door that had just closed.  
And those eyes.  
Those green sparkling eyes.  
"I have a daughter."

Jane whispered in disbelief.

The door opened and she came back. Mini Maura came in trailing behind an olive skinned doctor with short hair and sharp eyes.

The doctor smiled. "It great to see you awake Jane."

She frowns. " How long have I been...sleep?"

Her eyes glance to the teenager who is now standing near the end of her bed- arms wrapped around herself.

Her green eyes glaze over and she answers. "Three months."

Jane looks at the ceiling. She was so confused. Everything was so confusing.

Three months? What the hell happened...

"Let me properly introduce myself, " She took off her glasses and folded them, "My name is Doctor Remming. I am you're attending."

Jane nods to note that she has heard the doctor. Then she chances a look up at Dr. Remming and really _looks_ at her. She's short and poised. Dark pixie cut hair and grey eyes. Every plane of her face smooth and freckled.

She has freckles. She has freckles like- "Maura. Where's Maura?"

Jane questions before she has even thought about it. She looks to the young blonde as if waiting for her to answer.

The teenager fidgets. Nervous.

"Mom."

"Huh? I…." Mom? Again.

Jane closes her eyes and shakes her head. Trying to gather her thoughts as they all jumble and scatter like a whirlwind through her brain.

"Hold on…," She says to give herself some leverage to continue and ask the questions she's been afraid to.

She opens her eyes and they land on her. "You're my daughter."

The teen looked as if she had expected the question. Jane could see the wheels spinning in her head. "Yes. I am. You're my mom and-"

"Maura."

Jane finishes.

Inclining her head she nods. "Yes and in case you didn't remember...my name is Alice."

Jane's chest warms and she nods her head and test the name.' Alice."

Wait...me and Maura. Maura and I had a child? We were...together _together_.

"Maura and I had you together. Like together _together_."

Alice smiles. A smile that made the corners of her eyes crinkle lovingly. " Yes."

"Alice." Dr. Remming directs her attention to the young one. "I have to tell her."

The teenager suddenly looks stricken. "Don't -"

"It's important. She can't not know."

Jane frowns and is growing slightly irritated at the subtleties around her. "What is it? What is it that I don't know."

Alice looks at her mother and her eyes begin to water and Jane is immediately alarmed.

"What's wrong?"

"Nonna...Uncle Frankie, Uncle Tommy and Frost are in the waiting room. We come here every day." Her voice is soft and wandering. She is working her way up to something and 'Jane's chest can't help but tighten with each word spoken from her child's mouth..

"Okay."

Alice looks down and she begins to fiddle with her cardigan. Jane sees a tear drop onto her white sheets.

"You have two more children. Jacob and Emmaline. They're with Grandma."

Jane takes a deep breath to calm down. The monitor is going higher and higher and Dr. Remming looks like she could melt right in her place.

Jane clears her throat. Grandma?

"Grandma?"

"Constance…" Alice's voice cracks. Dr. Remming interjects, "You don't have to be the one to tell her Ali-"

"I didn't want them to bother you so that's why I only got the doctor."

"Okay." Jane replies and she is lost. She is so lost.

"I know that Ally.. but.." Jane looks at the doctor whose grey eyes are on Alice. Jane frowns and turns back to her daughter.

Her daughter. "Maura-"

"Mommy's gone."

Alice looks up from dripping lashes and shake her head. 'She's gone mama. She's been gone." Jane shakes her head. Gone. Gone?

Maura can't be gone. She has children with her. She- "She's gone?"

A hand rest on her shoulder that belonged to Dr. Remming. Jane looks up into grey eyes. "She passed, Jane. She's not in the waiting room."

Jane's face feels hot. She feels nonexistent as if she were floating. Nothing is making any sense. She just saw Maura in her dream.

'I don't understand."

She just saw her in her dream.

Her _dream_.

Jane closes her eyes and rubs her temples. She died. Maura **left** her.

"God..." Jane shakes her head as it comes back to her.

"No..." She could feel her pulse beating in her ears. It blocked out all other sound except the breath that was raggedly moving in and out of her mouth.

"Jane. Calm down."

"What?" Opening her eyes Jane looks to Alice. "What did you say?"

"Nothing." Alice replies with confusion and a small sniffle. Her eyes red rimmed- she frowns. "What is it?"

'"Right here darling."

Shifting her gaze to the right. She sees her. Oh my goodness she sees her.

Standing near the window with a smile she waves.

Jane is frozen and she cannot believe. She cannot believe what she is seeing.

Smoothing down her dress she steps forward into the beaming light that shone through into the room.

With watering hazel green eyes she smiles. A glimmer in her eye, hands clutching over her heart.

'"Hi pretty girl." She whispers.

Maura whispers.

Eyes explicitly on Jane.

"Maur…"

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Hi :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Jane stares on until Alice's face comes into view.

"Mom? Are you okay?"

Jane does a double take from Alice to Maura..Alice to Maura.

Alice...to the window.

The window? Jane frowns.

Where is she? Where did she go?

"Okay, I think it's time to we let Jane have sometime to herself," Dr. Remming smiles solemnly as the brunette looks around her.

"I'll inform you more about why you are here in just a few. But first…"

She points to Alice, who in turn points to herself. "Me?"

Nodding the doctor sighs softly, "Yes. You can go out and inform the rest of your family members about your mother," Quickly her eyes flash to Jane.

"If that's alright with you."

"Yes it's fine."

"Okay, I'll be right behind you."

Alice nods and sniffs.

"Okay…"

Green doe eyes turn to Jane helplessly. "Mama?"

And Jane knows. Holding out her arms Alice immediately embraces her.

Jane's nose is in between the crook of her neck and it's familiar. It is _so_ familiar.

Alice squeezes Jane. "Ma?"

Permission.

Jane can't help the smile that forms on her face.

"It's okay Alice."

Alice nods, acknowledging her mother- not letting go.

Jane feels her eyes begin to water. Did she dream her up?

Was she really there?

Why couldn't she remember her own daughter?

"It's going to be okay Alice." Jane wasn't sure whether she was saying it simply for Alice or for the both of them. But she needed it to be okay.

"I know." Alice whispers.

* * *

A car accident.

She had gotten into a car accident and ended up in a coma for three months.

 _Three. Months._

Sitting on her bed Jane scoffs, "How does that happen?"

Her children had been with Constance and Angela from time to time.

Speaking to Alice about it she made it seem as if it had been the same way before she had gotten into the hospital.

Jane ran her fingers through her washed raven locks- leaning back onto the bed's headboard.

"My babies…" Shaking her head Jane couldn't believe it. She couldn't believe anything but it was reality.

Angela has looked worn but so excited when she'd seen her. Frankie goofy and Tommy oddly quiet. He interacted with her but his presence seemed to have a different aura to it. Jane couldn't put her finger on it though. Frost was Frost. That much she remembered.

She took a big breath and rubbed the nape of her neck. Distress marking every line on her face..

The biggest thing that bothered her was that she didn't know her own children.

She didn't recognize them from the pictures Angela had shown her and it bothered her.

She felt a lone emptiness inside of her. She needed to see them. Would they be hurt if they knew she didn't remember them? Should she pretend? Jane laid her head on her pillow.

"I want to go home."

That's all she's been thinking of. Home. But where was home to begin with?

"You're thinking too hard."

Jane swiveled around to see Maura at the edge of the hospital bed. Hands folded and eyes glimmering.

"What the hell?"

Maura's face instantly scrunched up indignantly, "Language." She chimed with a twitch of a smile..

Stunned. The brunette sits up. "What are you...am I going crazy?"

Shaking her head, Maura straightens her back. "No. You are not going crazy. I'm here."

"Really?"

"Really."

"What-how?" Jane sputters as she begins to move from the bed.

Maura abruptly leans forward and puts her hand on Jane's knee. Jane freezes in shock and looks at Maura's hand.

"You're dead."

She couldn't think of anything else to say but the obvious.

Jane wanted to slap herself. Maura tilted her head of the slightest with a small smirk painting her lips.

"Yes." She concedes, "I am."

There is a moment that the silence emcompasses the two where all they do is look at one another like it was their very first meeting.

Jane pulls her legs onto the bed after Maura removes her hand from the brunette's knee.

Maura looks on and inclines her head.

 _It's okay._

Hesitantly the honey blonde reaches out to Jane -taking her hand. The brunette gasps when she feels her. She can _feel_ her.

Jane's brown eyes water as she reminiscences. "I remember you."

The brunette's eyes don't leave Maura's. She's entranced. The warm feeling in her chest felt good and she didn't want that to go away.

"Yes," Maura replied softly.

Eyes downcast and both hands covering her Maura's she struggles to take a steady breath.

"How long?"

Maura knows automatically what Jane is referring to.

"Two years."

"God." Jane could barely form the single word.

"Our kids.." She strains.

Maura chuckles lightly. Sadness shadowing her features.

"They are wonderful. You've met Alice."

Jane nods. A ghost of a smile forming. "She's beautiful. A mini you."

Maura smiles and nods in agreement "Yes." Sniffling Jane finally looks at Maura.

The honey blonde can't help the ache that creeps into her chest at the sight.

"The other two?"

"Emmaline and Jacob are angels. Innocent and curious. Daring from time to time."

With big brown eyes Jane looks like a child as she ponders her wife.

"Are you okay?"

Lifting her eyebrows in surprise, Maura questions, "Me? Why yes. Considering the circumstances."

Raising her eyebrows Jane realizes what she said and what's to slap herself again..

Sagging her shoulders, her voice comes out in a whisper as she fiddles with Maura's fingers.

"Why are you here?"

Maura inhales and exhales a moment of comfort passing between them.

"I'm here to help you, Jane. I'm here to help you heal. You don't remember now but you were not really _here_ while I was gone or..am gone."

"What?"

"You weren't the same Jane. You got stuck and I'm here to help you move from that place."

"I don't even know where I was stuck. I can't remember."

"I will help you remember. You opened a door for help Jane."

Frowning she shakes her head. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"You will. In the meantime you will be going home soon and that means meeting the children, my mother and others you most likely don't remember. But it's okay."

Standing now Maura's hands detaches from Jane's as she walks ever so slowly to the brunette's bedside.

The honey blonde puts her hand on her wife's cheek and Jane cannot think.

An overwhelming feeling of completion filling her. Gulping and then grasping the hand that was her wife's she squeezed.

"You promise?"

Bending down with a swiftness only Maura Isles had, she kissed Jane's cheek.

"I promise I'm here with you every step of the way. _Every_ step of the way."


End file.
